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New York, NY, 10001
United States

Life Coach, NYC, Executive Leadership Coach, Personal Development Coach, New York - Coaching Leaders, Entrepreneurs, and Creatives to be more Confident, Productive, and Fulfilled.

Notes from Yourself



Handling Annoying People (Know Any of Those?)

John Kalinowski

life coach, life coach nyc, mindset coach, leadership coach, personal development

I have a neighbor who bought a new dog a few months ago. It’s a French Bulldog named Missy - super friendly and sweet, honestly the dog could not be cuter... and she also seems to have the “cutest” bladder control issues. Given that I share a carpeted hallway with said neighbor, and my building’s carpet shampooer is being serviced, Missy’s very cute pee-stains have started to build up and weigh on my sense of well-being.

Or has it?

Yes, it f***ing has.

Maybe I just need to chill out and practice acceptance?

I’m not the God-damned Dalai-lama, and people need to learn how to act right.

Well, guess what, that’s probably not going to happen, so let’s go back to acceptance.

I hate you... ok.

When you work the process I outlined last week in, What’s Holding You Back, you may start to have these fun little arguments with yourself. The reality is that most people are asleep, meaning they are totally overwhelmed by the nonstop mental dialogue inside their heads, which cuts them off from the world around them. In all likelihood you are one of those people, at least sometimes. But, don’t worry, ‘cuz we all are! And by simply incorporating some new thoughts into your unproductive mental dialogue (ex. “I trust this will all work out somehow.”), then you will save massive amounts of time and energy that can be used to achieve a new mindset of peace, fulfillment, and productivity.

Personally, I would love to float through life all zen and peaceful, and some days I do, but I’m always tested, like when I find another gift from Missy. It leaves me with a choice to indulge in my negative thoughts or to coach myself by affirming that “I trust this will all work out somehow.” It doesn’t mean I’m not taking action, it just means I’m taking action while keeping my cool. I can talk to my neighbor and/or management about the dog problem, but I’m probably not going to transform my neighbor into a super considerate human. He’s asleep, and the best thing I can do for myself is to continue accepting him for who he is while taking care of my mindset by setting boundaries when necessary. Constantly choosing to replay the story in my head and getting myself riled up doesn’t help anyone or anything.

Here’s to a new week of productive thoughts!